Thursday, January 31, 2008

expression

How great it is to have a couple of people in your life in whose company you are largely unaware of your self - you are just free to be what you are. -tim keel


I recognize that I post mostly quotes. It's just that...really, I'm not much of a writer. What I love about my favorite writers, or writers in general, is that they are able to express the things that I feel and/or experience SO MUCH MORE EFFECTIVELY than I am.

And I like to express things...I think I am a very expressive person...so I express myself through others' expressions.

How's that??

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

90's

Here's what the last hour of my life musically has consisted of..

Most of Live's "throwing copper" cd
"stars" by Hum
"No Rain" by Blind Melon


oh 90's rock. where did thou go?

Monday, January 28, 2008

:) I like the Riddle playlist. I like playlists in general. making playlists is one of my favorite activities.

If we were to have a porchnight playlist, what would it include? maybe...

over the rhine
patty griffin
counting crows
radiohead??
sigur ros
ryan adams
jeff buckley
regina spekTOR

...what else?? :)

porchnight in Feb

lets recap...
took a long time to get the fire started. i think it was a lack of a Flannery.
abortion, obama, YL, dubya.
did i mention February.
and silly Fred Thompson thinks global warming is a myth.
silly Fred.
oh yea, radicals, and assination attempts.
silly fred (phelps)
i still think everyone would turn a blind eye if i took a trip to Kansas.......
11:00 on a worknight.
silly friends.
minimal alcohol.
new leaf?
stinky clothes.
a sense of danger with each pop of the fire. flying sparks.
good times.
good friends.

Sunday, January 27, 2008

itunes playlist

The Riddle Band was asked to make a playlist like the itunes ones you see online so i thought i would share them with you guys.

(Jeremy)

"Such Beauty" - Ian Mcintosh
This song is very fresh in it's sound and feel for worship music. Very "Muse" like in the guitars and melodies.

"Equally Skilled" - Jon Foreman
Amazing growth for the singer of Swtichfoot. The "Fall" EP is one of the better things Ive bought in the last few months. Very moving songs.

"Prodigal" - OneRepublic
Although known for thier hit "Apologize" I feel his voice is really strong on this whole record. This song has alot of underlying faith references, which is interesting for a band with this kind of overnight success.
_______________________________________________________________________

(Evan, Guitars)

"Head Home" - Midlake
It's haunting one minute and makes you want to ride a bicycle really fast the next. And the guitar solo is killer.

"Transmitter"- Daniel Lanois
There's something about pedal steel guitar when it's played in this fashion that resonates with my soul. The combination of the instrumentation and the chord structure and progression is, for me, like finally sleeping when you're exhausted.

"Help Me"- Johnny Cash
It's a reverent prayer of desperation by an old man who truly knows struggle and humility. It was recorded by a close friend just before he died, and wasn't released until after. It's slow, simple, serious, and honest, and I don't think there is a single instrument better than the bowed upright bass to portray the solace that Cash finds in this prayer.
_______________________________________________________________________

(Brandon, Drums)

"Catapult" - Counting Crows
Written after the death of Kurt Cobain, the lyrics sum up the stuggle of life in the spotlight, no matter how great or small. This has been my favorite Crows song
since middle school!!

"The Snake and the Crown" - Raine Maida
A great commentary on America. Slam poetry is a new thing for me, but i am quickly jumping on the bandwagon.

"Hoppipolla"- Sigur Ros
I'm convinced that this is the soundtrack to the opening of Heaven's gates. Convinced.
_______________________________________________________________________

(Josh, Bass)

"Got a Feeling" - Flickerstick
I first heard them on VH1, when they won the "Bands on the Run" contest a couple years ago. This song is so darn catchy! Verses, Chorus...*sigh* I wish I would have wrote it.

"Mexico" - Jump Little Children
Brandon showed me these guys about 6 months ago, so all credit goes to him. The singer has such a unique voice that grows on you the more you listen. These guys arent around anymore, but left us with some really amazing songs like this one.

"New Years Day" - U2
I saw U2in3D (Now playing in select cities!) a couple days ago, and although not my favorite U2 song of all time, its the one I've been humming all weekend so I'm going with it.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

and another quote...

"The individual, unlike the household and the community, always has two ways to turn: she or he may turn either toward the household and the community, to receive membership and to give service, or toward the relatively unconditional life of the public, in which one is free to pursue self-realization, self-aggrandizement, self-interest, self-fulfillment, self-enrichment, self-promotion, and so on. The problem is that-- unlike a married couple, a household, or a community-- one individual represents no fecundity, no continuity, and no harmony. The individual life implies no standard of behavior or responsibility."

-from "Sex, Economy, Freedom, and Community" by Wendell Berry

re: emo

“The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers.”
—M. Scott Peck

Sunday, January 20, 2008

winter

Now that the holidays are well behind us and the amount of activity has come to a halt, the time is right for us to spend more time at home, sheltered from the bitter cold. I'm looking out my front window at a winter sunset, and although the warm-tone colors of the sky are teasing me with thoughts of the spring, it is definitely winter.

It is appropriately winter, too. Winter is dark and cold-- the ground is frozen and much is dead or dying. Much in the rest of the world and in our lives feels the same way: dark and cold. Our human history does not seem to be moving in a good direction-- it seems more like we're walking down a road that leads mostly to death and dying, a possibly permanent winter.

Globally speaking, terrorism, disease, civil wars, , climate change, starvation, and a lack of clean water are all increasing, and compounding, problems. As for our nation, our economy, the price of gas, politics, land use, religion (see: Huckabee, Mike), and our failing military doctrines have many heads spinning, wondering what our future looks like. Locally, several large-scale employers are laying off thousands, families are losing their homes, race relations are tense, and many are hungry, lonely, desperate and very cold.

I guess this is my emo moment: It is not appropriate to talk about spring yet. Sometimes it is important to dwell just a little longer on what is wrong and scary and dark in the world, both for our own understanding of the depth of that darkness, and for our solidarity with those who experience that darkness not only existentially or metaphorically, but in the every day reality of their human experiences.

The sun finally went down, and I need to go do something else with my evening.

Thursday, January 17, 2008

home



She is home.
life is good again.
sorry about the blogging freakout.
love ya'll
B

“We don’t understand poetry is and what it’s for. If we did, we wouldn’t have such trouble with faith. By faith, I don’t mean signing up for a set of catechistic beliefs. I mean the recognition of wonder that pulls one’s self out of one’s self into the life of prayer.”

- Memorist Patricia Hampl, in National Catholic Reporter, 1.11.08; as quoted in Weekly re:Cap (www.capcomm.org)


That's for those of you that I saw on Tuesday. and...I just like it.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

what did the salmon say when he ran into the concrete wall?

"dam!"

Monday, January 14, 2008

Emo alert..dont read if you are having a good day..

im starting to feel like this is my personal blog.
lets go, help me out.

I love my wife. She has been out of town for a week, and there is nothing like the wife being gone for a week to really make me take an inward look at the being that is B.McCoy.
Sometimes its not a pretty site.
I am needy. I need my wife. I really need my wife on a regular basis. more than she needs me. she is very secure in her life. im not 100% sure that i am.
I feel rejected when my cat chooses to go outside at night instead of sleeping with me, just so someone is there. I get scared. I think that i am schizophrenic sometimes. i have for a couple years now. it gets worse when im alone.
When i am driving in my car. I want someone to call. When there is no one to call, i get pissed. When i get home, i jump on the internet and talk to friends on ichat for hours.
i cant be alone too damn much. never have been able to.
still cant.
the kicker is, i hung out with people almost every night amanda has been gone, and now all i want to do is sit in my house. This takes me back to where i started. Although i dont want to hang out with anyone, i dont want to be alone in my house. My cat is here, however, and i have three conversations going through ichat as i type this, so i dont feel as alone. Fuck.
When i cant think of things to say, i say Fuck. It is a verbal fallback. its not a terribly good one, but i dont care.
Amanda gets home tomorrow.
it'll all be better in the morning.. it always is...
i'm absolutely no fucking good at being by myself. Why is that? I think i have always been like that. What an interesting thing about my life. I sometimes hate learing new things when it has to do with me and things that arent right. I suppose thats the only way to progress in life right? You have to know where you are weak so you can focus on that area and make it better.
but whoever said that we all need to be better? why cant i just be some fucking guy who loves his wife, and hates being alone? thats what i am, and i seem to be getting along ok.... except for the last week or so. Indeed. Interesting.
Self preservation i suppose. thats why we get better right? No, we do it for others sake as well. Mostly for others. If we are to change, its better to change for others sake. If it helps you along the way, thats a bonus.
I played at a church that was full of Christians who were Christians for the sake of themselves. Im sure they live a much better spiritual life than i do individually. Meaning they are pretty tight with God. they yelled in the mic alot about what God was telling them. God doesnt tell me stuff like that too damn often. There is a side of me that wants to jump ship, and be one of those people who are in thier own world with God, where famine, genocide, poverty, war and other stuff doesnt exist. If it doesnt exist to me, then its not really happening, right? The people at this church seem to get on just fine. As long as the president doesnt believe in abortion or stem cell, we should be ok.
Im sure thats not true of everyone in that church, but it seemed like it at the time. The pastor is cool though.
I used to think Real Live Preacher was a lame whiney guy with some good ideas, but his blogs were downers.
then i just read everything i just typed, and realized im the bizarro RLP.
Its not Bono, but its better than Stalin right?
love you guys, sorry for the downer tonight. look what i turn into when forced to look at my life for a week!

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

2007....

when there are people out there making this type of thing. there is nothing else to say to sum up such a year...


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PuS-dD3sIzw