On the Road

Realizing that i might have just defaced the title of one of the greatest books of all time, perhaps i should rethink calling this entry "On the Road."
eh, either way.
February has been a long month for me. i have been home, but it doesnt feel like much. I have been on the road every weekend, usually for 3 to 5 days out, then the same amount of days home. I got incredibly sick for about a week and had to stay in bed while the crazy boys went out and had a good time. I played at a camp when great skiing was free and had to opt out so i could lie in a camp bunk bed for 31 hours straight. that blew.
Riddle played a show for 4200 people this month, which, excluding festivals, is a new high for me. Unfourtunately, i had a fever and the flu when it happened, and was so tweaked out on Thera-Flu at the time, i have very little memory of it.
I had the opportunity to be a "house band" drummer for some other CCM artists this month. The music was lame, but the experience was great. Resume's will be good in the future.
I have lost touch will almost all of my friends other than my wife, Steve, and the guys i tour with. When time home becomes a rest stop, and the only way to sustain a healthy marriage is to give it 100% of your time in town, the sad reality is that everyone else becomes expendable. I'm not sure if i owe apologies. i feel like i do, but this is reality sometimes right? I wrestle with feeling like a bad friend, or a bad husband, or a bad worker, or whatever. This job is so odd. There is nothing else i would rather be doing than playing music for a living, but at the same time, at what cost? I dont know what my cost is. It's there, but what is it?
I'm emo again. damn the luck. I'm in Hattiesburg, Mississippi, and thats reason enough to be emo. Evan is getting dressed and Riddle is singing scales. This is my life right now. I really do love it, i mean really. if you think about it, im blogging at work right?
much love friends, i'll be home soon and we can re connect. Sorry for not being around. I feel like if not for the text message and ichat, i would be in a black hole of Christian music.
peace